Monday 20 August 2007

revenge on the lawn and other (petty) vengeances

perhaps i should include mowing in the warm down routine of cycling. or perhaps i shouldn't. today i do and it's another hour or so of emotional deadness spared only by my leaving clumps of wild grass to annoy the neighbours with.

it strikes me that in amongst the clamour for energy saving in this time of climate change something is missing. how much energy do we expend on our little squares of green, our tonsured, billiard smooth lawns? too much surely. i blame the english and the french (i could construct an argument as to why but i haven't the breath).

near where i live there's a roundabout unremarkable for anything except that it's been seeded with a profusion of wildflowers and is currently a riot of colour. in a town marked (and given prizes for) its overly ornate, immaculately maintained yet still horrendous victorian style horticulture his roundabout is a corner (sic) of delight. i propose a campaign to eradicate the lawn, to replace it with the meadow, planted yes, but then left to its own devices. i propose that all government funding for horticulture, outside of historic gardens and playing fields, should immediately be cut and those areas left to become more biodiverse. those wishing to maintain their gardens as they are should be discouraged, even taxed, in favour of wild gardens or areas that actually produce food (hurrah for permaculture)

tear hanging baskets from public buildings, kick down the manicured hedges, flamethrower all fences. don't like urban graffiti - let the ivy do its work. as the weeds reclaim our cities i guarantee a more chilled out populace, free from the electronic whine of mowers, strimmers, where people travel by bike and prefer, instead of wasting in front of the TV, to lie back in the wild grasses, read a book or maybe even just look at the clouds

lawns. i hate them. yes, i do

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