Thursday, 19 July 2007

stress fractures

so i'm having the few days wait to see if i've stress fractures in my (L) tib. i'm hoping not but i've never damaged my tibialis muscles before, can't remember specifically knocking it at the race on saturday and never had a pain like it. a week off the bike is bad enough but the next race is in doubt and, if the fracture materialises my big race in october is out the window. i plan to play a lot of piano and guitar in the meantime.

i watch vinokourov in the tour and try to imagine what it must be like to do all that preparation and lose everything in a split second. or, as with moreau today, a hesitation, some ill luck and see it slip away

G and W say that cycling is my substitute for drugs/self harm. maybe they both have a point. T worries that i'm not spending enough time painting or writing but these days each day on the bikeis one day closer to not being able to do the bike any more. that day, with luck is far in the distance, but now, more than ever before i know it's there. cycling seems more and more a metaphor for life. sometimes, as with last week's road cycle, even amongst beauty we bury ourselves in suffering and others, as with the last lap of the race, on the way back in despite knowing my leg was past it, the cycle was so sublime i was like surfing, in and out of the trees, no time, no thought, total being.

3 comments:

Camplin said...

What kind of art work do you paint/draw? As an artist, I like to view other artists and see what is going on in other people's heads. If I see enough art work, I think I might be able to see the "spirit of the age," so to speak.

swiss said...

i can draw but i've always, since a child, been fascinated with colours, so big non-representational pieces are the things i've always been drawn to. the first time i saw an yves klein, it made me cry, as did, incidentally, brancusi's bird in space.
painting wise, until relatively recently i've favoured acrylics and i've worked so that the method is evident in the texture, i like the notion of water, but these days, and pehaps it's failing eyes, i'm being drawn more and more to the intensity and process of oils

swiss said...

tell you what though i had a look at your stuff. i like those portraits, esp fred turner. nice idea!