beware of the festive dog

this gem dedicated to the dog hit by marcus burghardt of t-mobile on stage nine of this year's tour de france

Beware of the Festive Dog

At the rise of the hand
of policeman, stop rapidly.
Do not pass him by
or otherwise disrespect him.

When a passenger of the foot
hove in sight, tootle the horn trumpet
to him melodiousy at first.
If he still obstacles your passage,
tootle him with vigour
and express by word of mouth
the warning ‘ Hi,Hi !’

Beware the wanderiing horse
that he shall not take fright
as you pass him.
Do not explode
The exhaust box at him.
Go soothingly by
or stop by the road-side
Till he pass away.

Give big space
to the festive dog
that makes sport
in the road-way.
Avoid entanglement of dog
with your wheel-spokes.

Go soothingly on the grease-mud,
as there lurk the skid demon.
Press the brake of the foot
as you roll round the corners
to save the collapse
and tie-up.

Found poem attributed to Edwin Miller in Japan 1935 – a note explaining rules of the road to foreign motorists – laid out in stanzas.

From River-Horse by William Least Heat Moon(p15) Secker and Warburg 2000